March 31, 2012


Rick Santorum, you may have heard, stopped off at a Wisconsin bowling alley in order to strut his stuff in those snazzy shoes while gettin’ real with the voters.  When a boy reached for a pink bowling ball, Santorum chided him: “You’re not going to use the pink ball.  We’re not going to let you do that.  Not on camera.”  Maybe in private you can roll pink bowling balls around, but out in public, you’ve got an image to preserve.

OK, so we all know Santorum is a homophobic, small-minded turkey buzzard who knows less about what it takes to run this country than my five-year-old, who will never become President because he was born abroad but that’s OK because he’s declared himself Chinese and has set his sights on the job of running China.  I’ve hated Santorum for years, before all the cool kids started doing it.  But, now he’s mocking boys who like pink.

Fucker, you just made this personal.

My seven-year-old son likes pink; it’s been his favorite color since before he could talk.  He has braved teasing and (possibly worse) tolerance, but he has stuck to his guns for years now. Something deep inside of him just loves the color pink, and he marches off to school in pink socks and pink mittens.  It’s not easy for him, don’t get me wrong.  He wants to fit in very badly.  But – just like I love chocolate and peanut butter – he is hardwired to like pink.

It doesn’t mean he’s destined to be gay or straight or an eight-foot-tall Slovakian nun.  It just means he likes pink.  Also Percy Jackson and Captain Underpants.

Boys who wear pink – boys who love pink – are not sissies.  They’re brave because they go out in the world knowing they will be mocked but stick to their guns.  They buck gender norms because they are smart enough to know idiocy when they see it. They don’t pander to the audience like some Presidential candidates we might name.

I told Zachary about the Presidential candidate who mocked a kid for choosing a pink bowling ball, and now every time I say Rick Santorum’s name, he boos.  If I gave him a grogger, he’d spin it.  Now even my seven-year-old thinks Santorum is a dickwad.

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  • Reply Painted Maypole March 31, 2012 at 4:31 am

    as a Michigan Mischief maker, I took a republican primary ballot and voted for santorum. it totally turned my stomach. why are ALL the republican candidates such @ssholes? Santorum does take the cake, though. just don’t frost it pink.

    love your son. love. him.

  • Reply Karen March 31, 2012 at 3:35 pm

    Oh please, please, please…. including it in my bedtime prayers that Santorum NOT get elected! This country has enough trouble in the punch bowl without him adding a wagonload of ignorant and religious crazy to the mix. He scares me all the way down to my Skechers.

  • Reply Courtney April 4, 2012 at 7:40 pm

    Meh, when your boy grows up he can become what we call “corporate trendy” and rock all the pink shirts and ties in the world (if that is what he wants to do!) – we have a myriad of fashionable VPs who wear pink and purple and all sorts of other similar colors. Santorum is just quite honestly the worst and while I don’t think he has a prayer in hell of getting elected at this point it is still so disturbing that a large number of people turned out for him at all. Yay for your boy, and his whole pink loving self.
    Things get so much easier when you grow up. I really actually believe that. Childhood is murderous.

  • Reply Abby April 11, 2012 at 2:33 am

    So Rick Santorum is telling boys that it’s not ok to like pink. You tell girls that it’s not ok to like pink. It’s just a color! It seems to me that you are both sending the same negative message to children.

    • Reply emily April 11, 2012 at 10:32 am

      I’m sorry, but when did I ever tell a girl it’s not OK to like pink?

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